6/4

WHY do I have to be such a shrimpy little thing? I mean, I’m about to start high school and the high school guys at the lake look at me and smile like they’re about to pat me on the head! If only I could gain a couple of inches and at least one cup size, I’d be happy… really Lord, I would. I’ve been told by an authority (okay, Sophie) that I look about 12. I KNOW, YOU DON’T HAVE TO REMIND ME! It’s so frustrating to look so young. And of course, Mom’s no help. “You’ll appreciate looking younger when you get to be my age,” she says. Like I really care about what I’m going to feel like at the OLD age of 38. It doesn’t help one little bit that I’m one of the youngest in my class; I will be barely 14 when I’m a freshman, and some people (Gray, for one!!) will turn 15 right after school starts!!

Mom told me today that I looked a little taller and I got my hopes up, I did. The she measured me on our “growing wall” in the kitchen, and I am now exactly FIVE FEET TALL. BIG WUP. I mean, I know I’m almost done. I asked her if the girls in the family grow much in high school and she just smiled that sympathetic smile and said that she’s sure I’ll grow a little more. Yeah, uh-huh. I grabbed her arm, and before she could mask her thoughts by listing menu ingredients, I caught it…she’s not holding out much hope for me getting any bigger. She gave me that you-shouldn’t-be-reading-me frown, but I don’t care. I wanted some honesty.

Well, all I can say is, I’d better be getting some Bazoooooms soon. Where are those Bodacious Beauties that I read about on the pop-up ads on the Net? Hmmmm? A-cup….barely. If my body doesn’t get busy soon, Gray is totally going to lose interest once school starts and he’s around all those DEVELOPED girls (I know, I know, I shouldn’t care about that, but I do). Nobody knows this but Sophie and Mom (and probably Dad but he’s not talkin’), but I haven’t even started…..you know….yet. No wonder I still feel like a little girl. My body doesn’t want to become a WOMAN……ugh!

And no email from Gray yet, but it’s only been one day. 95 degrees today……..I repeat, UGH!